Thursday, March 22, 2007

The Bill & Bob Show


I imagine AA is a very dangerous cult. I was associated with it for over 30 years. I imagine, it changes the structure of the brain and one slowly deteriorates into another dimension. The people talk in a monotone and their feelings are completely non-existent: “We don’t talk about feelings, we’re here to get sober!” If one starts to have feelings, one might drink!

I was fortunate, because I started seeing a therapist in 1994 and he helped me process my history and deal with the terror, shame and pain from my childhood. Recovery, for me is recovering that “little boy” who was horrifically abused and process the associated feelings [I spent all my childhood in orphanages].

I haven’t had a drink for 22 years, & I imagine if I depended on AA to recover I would end up a “gibbering idiot.” I was never insane but I imagine AA will certainly do the job for you, if you hang around long enough.
I know a guy who hasn’t had a drink for over 30 years and I imagine he’s quite mad. He severed our relationship because I said that AA was a cult and that Bill Wilson was a false prophet. We had been friends for 30 years. That’s how strong the AA trance can become. His words: “I don’t like people, running down AA! He didn’t tell me how he felt, because I imagine he doesn’t know. I imagine he’s a “rageaholic” [most Steppers are] & rages over his fear, pain and shame, which is exactly what I used to do before I started seeing a therapist.

I imagine AA is still in the “dark ages”, - so controlling and I imagine AA doesn’t keep Steppers sober.

Ones process is never about someone one else; ones process is back there in one’s childhood. AA has helped me to recover, because it was very much like my history: very controlling and oppressive. I also imagine it to be anti-Christ.

For me the journey of recovery has brought me to a deeper understanding of what Jesus Christ did for me. I should be in Hell but Jesus died on a cross for my sins. I called on him 3 years ago, after years of therapy and he has taken away all my fear and guilt. Jesus has forgiven me my sins, not a higher power but Jesus Christ the Son of God. I love you so much, Jesus, my Lord and Saviour. I could never forgive myself but Jesus did through his sacrifice, on the Cross.

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